Whomever has more desire has less power. This is the case no matter what you desire. If you go to a used car lot and find a car you desire, the moment you communicate that desire to the salesman, the price goes up. Whoever holds the object of desire gets to set the terms. WeContinue reading “Relationships, Part 16: Desire and Power”
Tag Archives: Relationships
Relationships, Part 15: When you Need Your Space, the Hat Method
Some days, you just need your space. The trouble is, your partner is there, too, and if you try to get some space, they may take it personally. You don’t want to get into a long discussion over why you need your space when you need your space. It may not be good to getContinue reading “Relationships, Part 15: When you Need Your Space, the Hat Method”
Relationships, Part 14: How Do You Respond to Bids for Attention?
1. Negative response “You want to go out to dinner tonight?” “I wouldn’t go out with you if you were the last man on earth.” It might discourage him from ever asking again. 2. Accusatory response “You want to go out to dinner tonight?” “You can’t make it up to me that easy.” Maybe not,Continue reading “Relationships, Part 14: How Do You Respond to Bids for Attention?”
Relationships, Part 13: The Dance of Relationship: A Guide to the Positions
When we think about love, we may picture something like this: This position is called Turning Towards. You’re facing each other and paying attention to no one but each other. You may be touching. You might believe this is the most desirable of the positions, but it’s very intense. It’s hard to do anything elseContinue reading “Relationships, Part 13: The Dance of Relationship: A Guide to the Positions”
Relationships, Part 12: Heads on Pillows
Here’s another exercise that can improve your relationship. It’s called Heads on Pillows. Set a timer for five minutes. Lie down with your partner, clothes on, side by side, facing each other. Put your heads on pillows. If your partner has one eye, you’re too close. Don’t speak, stroke, or grope. Try not to makeContinue reading “Relationships, Part 12: Heads on Pillows”
Relationships, Part 11: How to build admiration
You began your relationship admiring each other. Now, you might take her for granted. You might’ve forgotten what you ever saw in him. If this is the case, then take thirty days to reinvigorate your relationship with this simple, two step process. This is what you do: Every day, find one new thing to appreciateContinue reading “Relationships, Part 11: How to build admiration”
Relationships, Part 10: There is always natural variation within any couple
Take any two people and there will always be a natural variation between them regarding any characteristic. There will always be one who is more strict with the kids, open to in-laws, careful with money, adventurous in bed, ambitious about career, social, self confident, flirty, interested in a clean house, closer to family, better atContinue reading “Relationships, Part 10: There is always natural variation within any couple”
Relationships, Part 9: Secrets
If you’ve done the last few exercises, you may have squirmed a little, and maybe you have not been totally honest. When answering some of the questions on the Newlywed game or even when just telling about your day, you might have noticed telling your partner some things is easier than telling her others. MaybeContinue reading “Relationships, Part 9: Secrets”
Relationships, Part 8: How Was Your Day?
Most of us know this question as the desperate conversation opener our parents tried on us when they picked us up from school; as in: “How was your day, Billy?” said Mother as she surreptitiously checked in the rear view mirror for some clue of emotion. “Fine,” said Billy, rolling his eyes and plugging intoContinue reading “Relationships, Part 8: How Was Your Day?”
Relationships, Part 7: The Newlywed Game
You might not be old enough to remember the Newlywed Game on TV. Well, I am. Couples competed to demonstrate their knowledge of each other. Hilarity, and a few fights, ensued. It’s often surprising how much new couples don’t know about each other. It’s sobering to see how little old couples know. No matter howContinue reading “Relationships, Part 7: The Newlywed Game”
Keith Wilson - Counseling 