Alexithymia and the Hermeneutic Laborer

When Your Partner Can’t Talk About His Feelings “She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me, she loves me not, she loves me, she loves me not. She loves me!” Saying this while pulling petals off a flower is a silly way to determine whether she loves you, but it’s easier than engagingContinue reading “Alexithymia and the Hermeneutic Laborer”

Just What is a Good Grief, Charlie Brown?

Here was the world famous authority on grief; and there I was, your humble writer and shrinker of heads, sitting with him in a conference. He had just spoken about grief, the things that will cause it, what it does to people, and how to help them heal. He had many wise things to say,Continue reading “Just What is a Good Grief, Charlie Brown?”

Longing for Community

I was on Interstate 86, heading east, returning from a road trip that took me across most of the country, when I entered Allegany County, in western New York. It was a place I knew well, but not as well as I might. I lived in Allegany County for two short years before I movedContinue reading “Longing for Community”

Venting

I lot of people mistake venting for therapy. They think that if they can say what’s on their mind, they’ll feel better and get that problem off their chest. They will, up to a point. If you have something you’re trying to figure out, or something you need to be honest about, then vent away.Continue reading “Venting”

Do You Really Have a Choice with Your Feelings?

If you say you got pisssed off, gripped by fear, sadness overcame you, lost hope, filled with gratitude, or overwhelmed by joy; the passive voice you use about your feelings reveals a misconception of how they work. Continue reading →