Detect Dreams

When you’re stuck at an impasse. You find yourself gridlocked. You want children; she doesn’t. He wants you to go to church, but you’re an atheist. She likes to stay home; you’re always ready to party. There doesn’t seem to be any solution. There’s no way to compromise. You’re ready to call it quits. WhatContinue reading “Detect Dreams”

Don’t Force It

Especially when trying to bring about change My father was a car mechanic. When I was a kid, he tried to teach me all about cars, but I wasn’t very interested. After a while, he might have thought he was wasting his time, but one of his lessons stuck with me. I think about itContinue reading “Don’t Force It”

Why Can’t We Turn Away?

The fascinating and appalling state called abjection There’s a psychological mechanism that isn’t very well known, yet it’s involved behind the scenes in many emotions. It plays a part in disgust, revulsion, repugnance, aversion, distaste, nausea, abhorrence, loathing, detestation, horror, contempt, weird, outrage, terror, fear, fright, panic, dread, trepidation, hatred, hate, abomination, execration, odium, antipathy,Continue reading “Why Can’t We Turn Away?”

The Perils of Understanding

And how your prejudices can help you understand better I once worked as a therapist with a deaf female client in my office by having her type what she wanted to say to me, as I typed to her. I didn’t know much sign language but was eager to show off what little I had.Continue reading “The Perils of Understanding”

Don’t Be Mindless About Mindfulness

It doesn’t have to involve meditation If you have any connection to psychotherapy or psychotherapists and have been paying attention to trends, you’ve noticed that everyone in shrinkland is talking about something called mindfulness. I don’t know if mindfulness has infiltrated everywhere else as much as it has the land of shrinkishness; but if itContinue reading “Don’t Be Mindless About Mindfulness”

Some Strange Ideas about the Strange Situation

And stranger ideas about attachment A mother enters a room with her eighteen-month-old child. Neither have been there before. There’s a few toys on the floor. The mother leaves the child with a stranger for a few minutes. The mother returns. White-coated researchers are standing behind a one-way mirror with clipboards, recording everything that happens.Continue reading “Some Strange Ideas about the Strange Situation”

How Your Body Can Help You Find Peace

If you’ve been feeling depressed, anxious, grieving, guilty, or preoccupied with cravings, then you probably tried to reason yourself out of it. You’ve wanted to get your head screwed on right and the clouds cleared from your mind. You believed if you talked to somebody, they could tell you things that might help you feelContinue reading “How Your Body Can Help You Find Peace”